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Linguistic Fun

A Poem about reading in English

This anonymous poem reprinted in various sources humorously demonstrates some of the confusing words in the English language. Maybe it will give you a laugh. Remember, it is difficult to learn anything when you are stressed out, so take frequent breaks (but don’t quit) and try to appreciate the humor in learning proper English. It will be worth the effort.

When in the English language we speak
Why is break not rhymed with freak?
Will you tell me why it’s true
That we sew, but we also say few?
And why cannot makers of verse
Rhyme the word horse with worse?
Beard sounds much different from heard
Cord is also different from word
Cow is cow, but low is low.
Shoe never rhymes with foe;
And think of hose and dose and lose.
And think of goose and yet of choose.
Doll and roll, and home and some.
And since pay is rhymed with say,
Why paid and said, I pray?
Mould is not pronounced like could
And done is not like gone and lone.
If there is one tooth and a whole set of teeth,
Why shouldn’t the plural of booth be beeth?
If the singular is this and the plural is these
Shouldn't the plural of kiss be kese?
We speak of masculine pronouns he, his, him,
Why not the feminine she, shis, and shim?
If the plural of box is boxes
Why is it oxen instead of oxes?
If the plural of mouse is mice,
Why doesn’t house become hice?
If the plural of man is men,
Why is it pans instead of pen?
If the plural of foot is feet,
Why is it boots instead of beet?
To sum it all up, it seems to me
That sounds and letters just do not agree.

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